Why Do We Expect from Others to Act Like Us?

Why Do We Expect from Others to Act Like Us?
By Ahmad Amirali

Today, I visited my old high school to attend a parent-teacher meeting with my niece, who is also studying there. I attended and met teachers; they were all fascinated to see me as some of them still remember me as their naughtiest kid. They shared their observations and reviews about my niece’s academic performance, and during that conversation, one teacher told me, ‘She is quite a remarkable student, but, she does not participate actively in some activities. I am now expecting more from her.’ As a teacher, when you heard such observations, you start doing the depth analyses, and therefore, many things come in my mind during this conversation. Different children have different abilities and different level of understanding, multiple intelligences, and the list of such theories goes on in my mind. However, the thing that puzzled me more than anything when she said ‘I expect…’. I heard many parents giving valuable advice to their kids and reminding them how they should fulfil their parent’s expectations. The very first question that exploded in my mind was, why do we even expect from others to act like us or think like us? Read More …

Why Is Being Emotional Necessary for Our Children Better Future?

Why Is Being Emotional Necessary for Our Children Better Future?
By Ahmad Amirali

I still remember the words of my mum when I was nine years old, and I seriously injured myself while playing with a toy. I was crying continuously, and my mother kept reminding me ‘You are a boy, boys don’t cry, be brave and don’t cry.’ These are the words which we normally said to our children to comfort their feelings/emotions which they might have encountered for the very first time. Emotions like anger, guilt, sadness or even grief, shielding them with our courageous phrases, making them realise that these are ‘Bad Emotions’. One might’ve wondered why we don’t want our kids to experience certain emotions? Is there anything like ‘Bad Emotions’? As a human, we do have an emotional response to every situation and instance. It means every emotion has a certain meaning or importance in our lives. So why we start believing that being emotional is the sign of weakness and unnecessary for our kid’s personality development? Read More …

When You should Share Your Secrets? and Why

When You Should Share Your Secrets? and Why
By Ahmad Amirali

Have you ever wondered, why sometimes you want an urge to share your griefs, sorrows and the deepest dark thoughts to another human being? Most of the times, whether students or teachers like me, we all share our secrets to a person whom we assume that our secret will not be revealed to anyone else. In that way, people have experienced the relief of getting something off their chest by sharing personal information. Relieving the stress of hiding painful, emotionally stressful information by sharing it with a trusted confidant can be intense, freeing, and liberating.  However, much depends on the subject matter of the secret you share, including your, often justifiable, unwillingness to share it. Read More …

Why Do We Fear Change? Reasons and Remedies

Why Do We Fear Change? Reasons and Remedies
By Ahmad Amirali

Today, one of my office colleagues asked me about my first year when I started my teaching career. I told her that it was quite remarkable because I was passionate as well as confused about this new journey. She added that I’d changed a lot since then in terms of my thinking and the way I engage with the people. I exclaimed ‘really, you think so?’ and she said yes, I thought it would be tough for you. I laugh, but deep down, I question myself, why it is tough for anyone to adopt change? It is because we love the old part of ourselves or we simply afraid to change? Read More …

Why Empathy? The Science Behind Understanding Other’s Feelings

Why Empathy? The Science Behind Understanding Other’s Feelings
BY Ahmad Amirali

Last month was hectic, as well as an energetic month for me as I conducted educational camps in two of the major cities of Pakistan. Once again, I experienced that although people live in the diverse cultural and linguistic environment, still they value certain things in their life, which is common among us. Food and clothing are some of the things through which we can connect. Talking about connection, does it mean that feelings and emotions play an important role through which we interact with people? I found the answer when students normally share stuff with me that normally they don’t share it with anyone. I experienced the same when I interacted my students on these camps. It means even though I was completely stranger to them moments ago, they still believe and trust me enough that they can share their issues, confusions and even fears with me. The term which I was searching for this phenomenon was ‘Empathy’. Read More …

Help Children to See Good Side of Making Mistakes

Help Children to See Good Side of Making Mistakes

Recently three parents came to me complaining about their kids being naughty and taking a keen interest in home-related chores. I simply ask them how they handled the situation when their kids made mistakes? Two out of three parents confess that they use force by scolding their children or by using rough language; even one parent stated that she even swears her kids while scolding them. First of all, it is important to know that children, during their adolescence period, learn from their mistakes. Most adults understand this concept. We have failed to teach our children that there is a positive side to getting things wrong. Read More …

Are You Worrying About Something or Someone? Research Says It’s A Waste of Time

Are You Worrying About Something or Someone? Research Says It’s A Waste of Time
By Ahmad Amirali

Generally, as human, we almost spent half of our life worrying about something or someone related/unrelated to our lives. Students worry about their future or the exams which are due, teachers worry about the course completion, parents worry about their children’s performance in their school, school worry about how to overcome the shortfall of teachers and the resources in upcoming years. Everybody is somehow engaged in some sort of activity or thinking that makes them involved in a feeling called – worry. Why we worry about certain situations and is it healthy? Read More …

The Secrets of Learning a New language

The Secrets of Learning a New language

Have you ever wondered, you want to learn a new language but feel daunted or unsure where to begin? Ten years ago, I was not fluent in English speaking or writing, made loads of mistakes and sometimes my sentences did not make any sense at all. However, I believe that you don’t need some special talent or a language gene to learn anything new in your life. You just need passion and will to accomplish anything in your life.  My old friends, who know me since my childhood, now ask me how you make that happened? How is your English now making sense? Although it still has loads of grammatical errors and needs two to three proof-read cycles. My answer to them always the same, I gave myself time. Read More …

Why Do We Need A Friend to Survive in This World of Chaos?

Why Do We Need A Friend to Survive in This World of Chaos?
By Ahmad Amirali

Almost every year, during one on one sessions with my students, they share their deepest fears, confusions, and stress motivators. Majority of their concerns that puzzled their world are related to their social life – friendships. The question that every student, who suffered from traumatic social experience, ask ‘Sir, why someone hurt us who know us better than anyone?’ I simply listen to their concerns and let them answer their own questions – it’s one of my strategy where students find solutions to their problem by themselves. However, the question that puzzled me after hearing their concerns, ‘Why do we need a friend to survive in this world of chaos?

When I was in school, I fascinated one of the subjects so much – Social Studies, where we study human evolution and development. There I learn the definition of society that mentioned an important aspect of humans. Human beings are social animals who need other humans to survive and live happily in his world. Read More …

What Makes You, You? The Puzzle of Personality Traits

What Makes You, You? The Puzzle of Personality Traits

Have you ever wondered how you develop the personality which is an integral part of your identity? What inspires you to be who you are right now? Maybe you traditionally answered, I am like my dad or mom, I inspire by my teacher or a celebrity’s struggle and life story motivated my personality trait. Psychologists like to talk about our traits or defined characteristics that make us who we are. But psychologists like Brian Little, a Cambridge professor and the personality analyst, is more interested in moments when we transcend those traits — sometimes because our culture demands it of us, and sometimes because we demand it of ourselves. Read More …