Category: Human Development

Conversational Narcissism: The One Who Speaks, Controls the Conversation

Why Some People Always Try to Dominate A Conversation?

Yesterday I engaged in a compelling argument with one of my friends. She argued that ‘people who speak, controls’. Its like in every group, a social circle, or a workplace have one or two influential people who tend to speak more in a conversation or a group discussion. She believes that whoever is smarter, more experienced, louder, more obsessive — all the different ways power manifests. Somehow, I agree with her, but then I questioned why some people tend to control the conversation and try to prove that they are aces where everyone else is rookie? Is Conversational Narcissism really a thing?

Conversational Narcissism vs Cooperative Conversation

Dr Charles Derber, from The Pursuit of Attention, believes that people who always seek to turn the attention of others to themselves can be coined as Conversational Narcissist. Perhaps you may say after reading this statement that ‘Oh, I am not a dominating person, but I know someone who often dominates.’ However, Dr Derber argues that not always people talk more so they can prove something. Sometimes, that urge of sharing first generates uncontrollable feelings. Ever wonder when we couldn’t wait for someone to stop talking so we could jump in; we pretended to be listening intently, but we were really focusing on what we were about to say once we found an opening. This type of behaviour is opposite to narcissism – it is called Cooperative Conversation. Continue reading “Conversational Narcissism: The One Who Speaks, Controls the Conversation”

Why Do Students Want to Be Perfect in Everything?

Why Do Students Want to Be Perfect in Everything?
By Ahmad Amirali

“Sir, I meet my subject tutor today and he told me that achieving 95% in mathematics and science I, not a big deal and overall 85% is an average grade for a student like you….my parents appear to have a similar kind of thoughts… I feel so much pressure, what if I lost or unable to achieve these grades….”

This is one of the common concerns or what can I say a ‘trauma’ shared by many students, but differently, since I started my teaching career. Each year, several students graduated and happily embark upon their career journey. Some reach out their goals and successfully achieve whatever they’ve planned for their future. However, some teenagers try to pursue whatever their parents, teachers, friends or relatives think are best for them and in that pursuit all they do is simply sacrifice every dream they ever dream for themselves. The question is why is it necessary for students to achieve greatness in every walk of their lives? Does it come from within or from the adults around them? Continue reading “Why Do Students Want to Be Perfect in Everything?”

Are You Alone in Your Loneliness?

Are You Alone in Your Loneliness?
By Ahmad Amirali

Humans are roaming on this planet for about billions of years along with all the different types of species. Every single being is connected through many facets, ecologically, and one of the aspects is ‘Emotions’. We do have emotions because we feel, just as everything else does – trees, animals, insects everything feel in some way, and that’s how we all are connected with each other. However, I am leaving some room here for critics, as some people might not agree with me. Talking about emotions, have you ever found yourselves alone in a room full of people? Have you ever felt invisible in the middle of a conversation with your friends or family members? Have you ever felt lonely even you’re surrounded by your loved ones? You know what, you might not be alone in your loneliness. Continue reading “Are You Alone in Your Loneliness?”

Why Is Being Emotional Necessary for Our Children Better Future?

Why Is Being Emotional Necessary for Our Children Better Future?
By Ahmad Amirali

I still remember the words of my mum when I was nine years old, and I seriously injured myself while playing with a toy. I was crying continuously, and my mother kept reminding me ‘You are a boy, boys don’t cry, be brave and don’t cry.’ These are the words which we normally said to our children to comfort their feelings/emotions which they might have encountered for the very first time. Emotions like anger, guilt, sadness or even grief, shielding them with our courageous phrases, making them realise that these are ‘Bad Emotions’. One might’ve wondered why we don’t want our kids to experience certain emotions? Is there anything like ‘Bad Emotions’? As a human, we do have an emotional response to every situation and instance. It means every emotion has a certain meaning or importance in our lives. So why we start believing that being emotional is the sign of weakness and unnecessary for our kid’s personality development? Continue reading “Why Is Being Emotional Necessary for Our Children Better Future?”

When You should Share Your Secrets? and Why

When You Should Share Your Secrets? and Why
By Ahmad Amirali

Have you ever wondered, why sometimes you want an urge to share your griefs, sorrows and the deepest dark thoughts to another human being? Most of the times, whether students or teachers like me, we all share our secrets to a person whom we assume that our secret will not be revealed to anyone else. In that way, people have experienced the relief of getting something off their chest by sharing personal information. Relieving the stress of hiding painful, emotionally stressful information by sharing it with a trusted confidant can be intense, freeing, and liberating.  However, much depends on the subject matter of the secret you share, including your, often justifiable, unwillingness to share it. Continue reading “When You should Share Your Secrets? and Why”