Why Is It Necessary for Teens to Set Emotional Boundaries?

Why Is It Necessary for Teens to Set Emotional Boundaries?
By Ahmad Amirali

Being emotional is necessary for kids, especially for their personality grooming (Previous Article: Why Is Being Emotional Necessary for Our Children Better Future?). However, it is also essential for teens to maintain some emotional boundaries as they are entering the practical phase of their lives. Every year one of the parent’s most severe concerns consist of their child’s sensitive behaviour towards their social, religious or academic circle. Parents concerns make perfect sense to me because, being an adult, they themselves finding it difficult setting their own emotional boundaries and therefore they consider being emotional is kind of a weakness which is not true.  Let’s get through it with an example; you living in a big house with your family and a huge barn with a horse stable.  Every morning you wake to witness this remarkable peaceful site where everyone, human and animal, loves each other. However, the whole area where you are living has no fence in it or a ‘boundary’ that mark your territory. What would be the repercussions of not having a fence? Yes, the security of loved ones, kids, wife, parents, animals and the beautiful, peaceful life will be on stake because its ‘open to anyone who wants to come’. Now put your teen’s emotions in place of this remarkable site and repeat the situation and you will find ‘having fences’ will come handy. The solution is ‘having fences’ not to get rid of this peaceful site and to shift somewhere else. So, the question is what is an emotional fence or a boundary and how we can manage to put it in our life? Read More …

Why Do Teens Shut Themselves Away from Their Family and Friends?

Why do Teens Shut Themselves away from their Family and Friends?
By Ahmad Amirali

There are times when students find it difficult to express their stressed-out feelings to anyone. In this case, they simply isolate themselves from their families and friends to sort out available solutions for their problems.  Similar kind of behaviour I witnessed the day before yesterday, in one of my students when she appeared late in my session. She was quite all the time and hardly even participating in any activities. She is one of the active students and therefore her behaviour was quite suspicious to me. When class concluded she simply come to me and handed over her worksheet and the moment she starts bursting in tears, crying out loud. Some students who were there simply have no idea what had just happened or why it was happening. I asked other students to leave the classroom. I didn’t say any word, and after a while, when she realised about her situation, she stops crying. I offered her a glass of water, upon asking she reluctantly shared that her sister’s marriage and her midterm exams are falling on the same week and she did not do well in her previous year’s tests. So, her parents are quite pissed this time. But She also does not want to miss all the shenanigans and memorable events of her sister’s marriage. She is not performing wholeheartedly for her exams as well as not able to enjoy her sister’s wedding. I counsel her, sort out her timetable, and talk to her parents about it. However, I wondered why she decided to shut herself down when she starts encountering the issue in the first place? Is shutting herself down helped her to sort out the solutions? Or sharing her concerns basically makes a difference? Read More …

Why Suicidal Thoughts Are Appeared to Be Common Among Teens?

Why Suicidal Thoughts Are Appeared to Be Common Among Teens?
By Ahmad Amirali

Almost every year, I observe adolescents who struggled with trauma and anxiety due to social and academic pressures. The most common among all is the suicidal thoughts that are now becoming more common nowadays among teens. Last year alone, two of my previous students attempted suicide; luckily, they both survived. The underlying reasons behind these disturbing behaviours are more or less same, i.e. anxiety, peer or academic pressure etc. Family involvement and social support might help affected teens to recover from their depression, but the road to recovery can be rocky, and therefore, most of the time, adolescents find it hard to recover from their traumatic past. The question is Why the teen’s suicidal rate astonishingly increased since the past decade? Read More …

The Passive Aggression: Students Act of Purposeful Hidden Revenge

The Passive Aggression: Students Act of Purposeful Hidden Revenge
By Ahmad Amirali

Being a teacher, every year, I encountered numerous students’ behaviour. Some behaviours and its reasons are known to me, but some are way too tricky for a teacher to understand at first instance. We, teachers and parents, all aware that adolescents procrastinate when it comes to finishing any tasks on time. It is because their mind prioritises the tasks as per the level of their boredom (Previous Article: Why Do Children Misbehave? – Reasons and Solutions). There is nothing to worry about it as this behaviour is common among all ages and every kid. However, it can become the matter of concern for most of the teachers and parents when student chronically procrastinates, tempers underperforms, tests the spirit of class rules, and challenges teacher’s authority in the classroom. In my early teaching years, these types of students were the ones who always know how to break every rule of my diary in a subtle way that at times I felt emotional and helpless in front of such kids. If you, as a teacher or a parent, ever dealt with or encounter such students’ behaviours, chances are maybe you’re dealing with a ‘Passive Aggressive’ student. Read More …

How Risky the Teenage Obsession of Social Media Is

How Risky the Teenage Obsession of Social Media Is
By Ahmad Amirali

Yesterday, one of my students texted me that he sent me a friendship request and it’s still pending, kindly accept it. He is now in his high school, and so I texted him back that I will look into it will confirm it. I usually don’t accept friendship requests from my students as long as they are studying with me. After which, I accepted their requests. This was an exception, However, the thought that struck my mind that my students already have my number he can contact me via call or text at any time then why is that important to him that I should accept his social media request? We can socialise face to face or via call, we humans don’t require an app or a medium to socialise with other humans. Does my students’ reaction on not accepting his friend request is the result of recent technological boom, or it is an obsession of social media itself? Read More …

To Protect Children’s Future, Parents Should Stop Protecting Them from Failure

To Protect Children’s Future, Parents Should Stop Protecting Them from Failure
BY Ahmad Amirali

I remember my childhood when my mom always reminded me that failure was not an option in my exams. This philosophy is still running in many homes, but now the competition is now getting much fiercer than before. Now, the race is not against the pass or fail but of achieving higher grades and test scores. Nowadays, students are in more pressure than students twenty years ago. Moreover, this parental desire to see their kids shine leaves little room for children to make their own mistakes and learn from them. The question is, what would be the lifelong threats for a child who is overprotected by his/her parent? Is overcontrolling a hazard to their mental and social growth? Read More …

Teen Anxiety | Reasons and Remedies

Teen Anxiety | Reasons and Remedies
By Ahmad Amirali

Nowadays, more teenagers are facing anxiety issues rather any other age group. Majority of the reasons are related to their transitional period from adolescence to teenage. It is then teens start having their mood swings and feeling pressured (Previous article: Why does Child’s Mood Start Swing after ten years? Causes and Preventive Measures). First of all, parents and teenagers, it important to know that all teens experience some amount of anxiety at times. It is, in fact, a normal response to stress, and sometimes it helps teens to deal with tense or devastating situations. Things like public speaking, final exams, significant athletic competitions, or even going out on a date might cause feelings of uneasiness among teens. Anxiety attack may include from elevating heartbeat to the intense urge of crying-, depends upon the severity of the situation. However, for some teens, these episodic restless events might become a lifelong disability which later affects their relationship and social order of their lives. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, approximately 25% of 13- to 18-year-olds have an anxiety disorder, and just under 6% have a severe anxiety disorder. Read More …

Why Students’ Social Life is as Important as their Studies

Why Students’ Social Life is as Important as their Studies
By Ahmad Amirali

Have you ever asked any youngster or youth, what was the best part of their school life? What were their responses? Well, if someone asks me, which my students usually do, my response will simple my school friend whom I spent most of my time with. I remember my school days because of my friends. Sometimes, parents complain to me about their child’s social lives that they need to concentrate on their studies instead of wasting time with friends. Even some parents brought good suggestions like why their children need even a friend circle; they have their family; it should be enough for them. On the other hand, some parents worry about how they would help their kids to cope with the challenges, heartbreaks, and the joys of making friends, losing them, and making friends again. Read More …