Do We Really Know the Meaning of Paying Attention to Something?

Do We Really Know the Meaning of Paying Attention to Something?
By Ahmad Amirali

Recently I watched a movie ‘Sherlock Holmes (2009)’ starring Robert Downey Jr. as Mr Holmes and Jude Law as Dr Watson along with a couple of other Hollywood stars. The plot of the movie spun around a character of Sherlock Holmes who is a fictional consulting detective in London 1880-1914 created by Scottish author and physician Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (GoodReads). Holmes is a master of disguise, reasoned logically to solve mysterious cases through his remarkable sense of observation and analytical skills. However, I am not writing this article to share you with my reflections about the movie; instead, I started wondering what the true art of paying attention to anything is? Or to be precise, do we really know what it means when we say ‘we are paying attention to something’? Continue reading “Do We Really Know the Meaning of Paying Attention to Something?”

5 Things Parents Should Not Say to Their Child in Front of Others

5 Things Parents Should Not Say to Their Child in Front of Others
By Ahmad Amirali

Recently, I have met one of the students for one-to-one sessions, where they want to discuss any queries and concerns regarding their academic development. She seems quite well while talking about her classroom performances until when she starts sharing her home tasks. Suddenly she asked ‘Sir, am I looking rude to you? It was an abrupt question; I said ‘No, dear certainly not but what makes you asked this from me? She shared with the lower voice, ‘my grandparents and even my parent always said that I am rude and I don’t care about my other siblings. I felt I am a bad person and I should have started working on it.’ We finished our one-on-one session on a happy note but I kept wondering what would happen to the kid’s mental wellbeing when we scold them or hit them in front of other family members? Continue reading “5 Things Parents Should Not Say to Their Child in Front of Others”

What Do You Want to Be In 2020 – A Survivor or A Free-Soul

What Do You Want to Be In 2020 – A Survivor or A Free-Soul
By Ahmad Amirali

As 2019 ends, many of us will going to reflect on how things terribly went wrong or tremendously went well for them throughout the year. Reflection is the very thing which I learned when I entered the teaching profession. However, before measuring yourself on the right and wrong scale, take a moment and think about how many hours you have spent for yourself? – Yes, for yourself. One of my previous students greeted happy new year this morning and asked me how was my year. I replied it was great and he again asked sir, how it went? Yet again I replied with the same answer – it went well. He again asked ‘Sir, how you survive this year?’ and this time I didn’t respond because this is what we do to our self every year. We simply survived every year by struggling with our problems, stress, exams, un-successful crushes, uneven work experiences, worst classroom experiences and yet after all that we again get our self-ready for the next year to repeat that ‘Survival cycle’ and the life goes on. The question is, are we living to survive or survive to live through our whole life? Continue reading “What Do You Want to Be In 2020 – A Survivor or A Free-Soul”

Dealing with Parent-Child Trust and Control Issues

Dealing with Parent-Child Trust and Control Issues
By Ahmad Amirali

These days I am attending a residential ten-day adolescent and youth training program where selected educators around the country meet and gathered in one platform. Yesterday, while discussing youth-related issues with one of the educators over dinner, a topic arose that why youth no longer trust their parents nowadays? After a while, we went for dinner but this brought a series of questions in my mind. Being a secondary educator, parents usually come and share their concerns about their child’s behaviour and ask for suggestions. And I remember that sometimes, parents simply said ‘My child doesn’t trust me’ or ‘I think my boy is having trust issues with me’. Although I discuss in my previous article Why Do Teens Shut Themselves Away from Their Family and Friends? that such short-term behaviour in adolescents is common, and it usually happened when adults unable to keep their promises with their child. However, what if their short-term behaviour would become their life-long habit? What if the reason behind this untrusted behaviour is far more different than simply broken promises? Continue reading “Dealing with Parent-Child Trust and Control Issues”

Examophobia: The Exam Stress in Teenagers – Reasons | Remedies

Examophobia: The Exam Stress in Teenagers – Reasons | Remedies
By Ahmad Amirali

Last week, I was reviewing ‘Parent Reflections’, which I collected from parents during parent’s One-on-Ones, and come across a reflection that caught my attention. According to that parent, her kid’s classroom performance and lesson engagement are quite satisfactory; however, she believes that her kid takes examination and class tests too seriously than anything else in his routine. The term which she used to explain her kid’s stress is ‘Examophobia’, the most common and interesting fear among students since the ‘advent of examinations’. Every year, students and their parents share similar kind of concerns to me about how they plan their time table to manage and prepare for their mid-terms and finals. However, the question which I ask every year and especially after reading this reflection is what triggered in students to developed such exam/test-related stress that sometimes it even becomes a ‘Phobia’ in some teens? Continue reading “Examophobia: The Exam Stress in Teenagers – Reasons | Remedies”

Coping with Teens: The Demanding Phase of Teenagers

Coping with Teens: The Demanding Phase of Teenagers
By Ahmad Amirali

Last week, a parent approached me after my class and shared one concern about her teen, which is of every parenting concern nowadays, that she is now becoming more and more demanding materialistically. She believes that her daughter, who is one of my students as well, always complains about the way they live in a ‘joint-family’, means she doesn’t have any privacy apart of her bedroom which is also shared with her younger siblings. However, the parent also appreciates that her daughter understands all these issues very well. Still, sometimes she argues too much with other family members and her siblings over small matters. The parent seems so desperate that she almost takes 30 minutes to share every bit of her mind with me. Once she finished, her daughter arrived, and she left without asking for a solution to her concerns. Maybe she only wants to share her worries to lighten up her emotions. However, while listening to her, several questions burst into my mind. First, if her daughter is that much reasonable, then what makes her react in such a rebellious manner at home? As per my observation, she is one of the obedient students of my class, and she hardly shows any sign of stress during the lessons. Is she really a demanding and attention seeker child at home or, maybe, her parent has misinterpreted her? Or perhaps all the assumptions are wrong, and the only issue is the communication gap between the daughter and the parent. Let’s find out. Continue reading “Coping with Teens: The Demanding Phase of Teenagers”