Yesterday, I had a small conversation with one of my colleagues, discussing her future career goals she is looking out nowadays. As discussion precedes, I observe that she is too insecure and unmotivated for her future goals. She kept criticising her skills, education, things that turned around in her life and the way she is living her life right now. I confess that I’ve been observing her since months that something bothering her, even she looks normal to people, but her daily routine keeps on saying that she might be depressed or something. The similar kind of behaviours can also be found in students as well. Throughout the term, students come and discuss their anxiety and the way they feel when they encounter some sort of failures in their daily lives (Previous article: Why Should We Celebrate Our Failures?). The question is why such thoughts sometimes overcome our all the abilities and our achievements of our lives? Why do we start forgetting all our struggles whenever we encounter any drawback in our lives? Why suddenly we start feeling to end this life due to any failure? Continue reading “Why Self-Affirmation is Important to Support Struggling Adults and Students”
Today, I visited my old high school to attend a parent-teacher meeting with my niece, who is also studying there. I heard and met teachers; they were fascinated to see me as some still remember me as their naughtiest kid. They shared their observations and reviews about my niece’s academic performance. During that conversation, one teacher told me, ‘She is quite a remarkable student, but she does not participate actively in some activities. I am now expecting more from her.’ Different children have different abilities and levels of understanding, multiple intelligences, and the list of such theories goes on in my mind. However, the thing that puzzled me more than anything when she said, ‘I expect…’. I heard many parents giving valuable advice to their kids and reminding them how they should fulfil their parent’s expectations. The first question that exploded in my mind was, why do we expect others to act like us or think like us? Continue reading “Why Do We Expect from Others to Act Like Us?”
Almost every year, during one-on-one sessions with my students, they share their deepest fears, confusions, and stress motivators. The majority of their concerns that puzzled their world are related to their social life – friendships. The question that every student, who suffered from traumatic social experience, ask ‘Sir, why someone hurt us who know us better than anyone?’ I simply listen to their concerns and let them answer their own questions – it’s one of my strategies where students find solutions to their problems by themselves. However, the question puzzled me after hearing their concerns, ‘Why do we need a friend to survive in this world of chaos?
When I was in school, I was fascinated by one of the subjects so much – Social Studies, where we study human evolution and development. There I learn the definition of society that mentioned an essential aspect of humans. Human beings are social animals who need other humans to survive and live happily in their world. I develop a sense that friends are necessary, and without a friend, I don’t even survive in this world. Similarly, we all have a different meaning of friends and friendships in our lives, and none of these definitions is wrong. However, if I ask, what common feature you will find from each of these different definitions of friendship? What would be your answer? I believe the only thing that is common among different types of friendships is – An ear that listens to us. Humans need other humans o make sure that they are not alone, yet the sense of surety will only be possible when we hear what others want to say or express to us. Continue reading “Why Do We Need A Friend to Survive in This World of Chaos?”
Have you ever wondered how you develop the personality which is an integral part of your identity? What inspires you to be who you are right now? Maybe you traditionally answered, I am like my dad or mom, I encouraged by my teacher or a celebrity’s struggle and life story motivated my personality trait. Psychologists like to talk about our traits or defined characteristics that make us who we are. But psychologists like Brian Little, a Cambridge professor and personality analyst, is more interested in moments when we transcend those traits — sometimes because our culture demands it of us, and sometimes because we demand it of ourselves. Continue reading “What Makes You, You? The Puzzle of Personality Traits”
Last year was the most extensive and complicated year of my life in terms of career, growth, home and health. I learned that life is like a ‘trade cycle’. The moment you reach the peak of your aims and start feeling that now everything is achieved, that moment becomes our first step towards our recession. Does it mean that we should not celebrate or feel enthusiastic about our success? Or does it mean that we should not mourn over our failures and mistakes? I believe all of us experience our ups and downs throughout our lives. However, I am pretty much sure that almost all of us remember the time when we experienced losses, mistakes, difficulties and failure more clearly than the time when we celebrated our success. Why our mind keeps a clear record of our faults rather than success? Because learnings always come from failures. I still remember the quote from the cartoon’ Lion King’ ‘the past can hurt, but the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it – Rafiki’. Continue reading “Why Should We Celebrate Our Failures?”